what, not why...

Wes is my eldest son. In the early hours of 26 January 2014, he died in a road accident. Based on witness and police accounts, Wes had lost conciousness instantly. He couldn't be revived and passed away at the scene.

In a second, life became meaningless. Overwhelming grief, horror and pain kept in check only by things we had to do. There were people we had to tell; those for whom a phone call would just be too unbearable. Wes's brother, his mother and I did the best we could before collapsing in a heap at a good friends' house.

As the morning wore on, there were others to tell. Each phone call made it worse. Why, I kept asking myself, why, why? Wes was 2 weeks away from his 23rd birthday. He was a happy, optimistic, positive, creative, healthy young man with a ready smile. He had everything to live for.

Then it dawned on me slowly. It's not why, it's what. The hundreds of messages, phone calls and visits made by people, telling us what Wes meant to them. Clearly, he left a positive impression on everyone's life. Wes did everything he had planned to do; what he wanted to achieve, he had in his efficient, pleasing way. He was a talented musician, playing in a couple of bands, an artist, writer and cricketer. Wes had a big heart. He always put others first.

Earlier in January, on a whim, I arranged to meet Wes for dinner at the pub where he worked as assistant manager. We had a lovely time, full of laughter and conversation. I texted him to say how much I enjoyed our time together. He sent this reply:

"It was great to see you too. Glad it was quiet enough to have a chat! Sorry I've taken awhile to get back to you...good luck with your eye appointment x"

I replied:

"Likewise, my lofty friend. Hope you got the bike home. Have been spreading the word. Put some pics of your bro at the gig on FB xx"

God bless you, my wonderful son. I love you more than words can describe. Take care until we meet again. Farewell, my lofty friend.

to hs2 or not to hs2...

British democracy is a strange thing. It gives you and me a right to question everything. Power in the hands of ordinary folk and all that....

Having said that, it is also a mechanism for wasting time, money and a huge excuse for nimbyism. About 20 years ago, the proposed Avon ring road went uncomfortably close to where I was living in south Gloucestershire. The government and local authorities had been delayed by wrangling along the way with assorted pressure groups. Despite this, local roads were upgraded and fears grew about increased traffic and loss of business.

True, traffic increased. That was likely due to increased vehicle ownership per household. Local businesses actually expanded, as quick deliveries were now possible. Journeys from the northern border of south Gloucesterhire to south Bristol were now done in minutes, rather than the 1.25 hours it used to take. Pity a light railway wasn't built alongside.

More people were in the area, possibly lured by the carphone warehouse/next/new look/pc world et al type of retail parks just off the ring road. When bored of that, they often ended in a local pub, restaurant or small shop. It took the main local bus operator 15 years to make the most of this. They are now trying, at least, but being Firstgroup, obviously they know everything except how to run an affordable and reliable service.

Everyone's worst fears didn't materialise. I was saddened a bit; the ring road ploughed through farms and fields where my youngsters and I went for rambles to look at moo-cows and red tractors. Now, one youngster rides a 700cc motorbike on the ring road to and from work. I hope he remembers some of the time spent playing in these fields with his old man.

Whether HS2 will bring perceived benefits to all areas remains to be seen. But not to build it seems utterly foolish. Successful countries have fast rail links to most regions. Of the ones I've used, there have never been delays because a high speed train had been stuck behind a slow-running choochoo...

doctors accuse govt of huge cuts in surgeries' spending

Some years ago, my quick-thinking General Practitioner (GP) spotted what were early signs of pancreatic cancer. It's often misdiagnosed as diabetes. Had that happened, someone else would be writing this, I guess... If he did that with me, it's very likely he spotted many other cancer conditions early.

My feeling is that my GP was on a good salary. I know he has 3 children and we frequently spoke about him funding their aspirations. He retired this year. I'll miss him.

I'm not concerned about what salaries GPs earn. All of them would have gone through 7 or 8 years of training. I feel that if they are willing to invest that length of time getting skills in caring for others, then a high salary is not a bad thing. Far more than that is earned by couldn't-give-a-toss Investment Bankers and the Vice-Chancellor of Bath university.

Cutting GP budgets is a retrograde step that will benefit no one. It's an odd thing to do,  given the previous promises of giving GPs more control. Clearly, they didn't mean more money.

the next stop is easier...

Three weeks ago, I felt a little uneasy having eye surgery. Thanks to skilled surgeons, all seemed to go well. That uneasiness turned to anxiety when my dearest mother was taken to hospital, following a minor stroke. This anxiety deepened further when my mum was readmitted to hospital, following earlier surgery. Deep anxiety turned to deeper sorrow when mum passed away peacefully, 48 hours later.

Today, my brother and I arranged Mum's funeral. It was a day neither of us wanted to happen. Being businesslike had to take priority - many wishes and details to consider - emotions put back to do this as efficiently as we could.  I won't pretend it was easy. A big, big thank you to everyone for being so kind, supportive and understanding.

Then a Facebook status update from my eldest son: "2:1. That'll do." He has passed his degree!  I never had any doubts - he worked hard! Suddenly, anxiety, sorrow and stress get tempered with feelings of pride and happiness. Soon, sadness follows. His Grandma won't be here to make a big fuss of my son.  But I will do that in her place...I know she would have been very proud of him.

For the past weeks, my emotions have been like travelling on rush-hour public transport: crowded together; little room to manoeuvre or be comfortable. Yet I know that as a train, bus or tram nears outer suburbs, its load invariably lightens; leaving more room.  I can almost hear the announcement:"....this is the service to Your life. The next stop(step) is Easier...."

bad weather?

Britain faces a wintry weekend as heavy rain, strong winds and up to 8cm of snow expected to affect much of country - The Guardian

I'm expecting these headlines:

• Daily Mail - "UK covered in snow due to large number of immigrants from Arctic region."
• The Sun - "They stole all my good weather, says Kelly, 26, mother of 5..."
• Daily Star - "Sunshine snubs Britain."
• Daily Mirror - "Exclusive: Snow falls on Good Friday"
• The Express -" Cheers as snowfall boosts chances of day off for millions..."
• The Times - "Snow falls as...[To see full headline, you need to subscribe]
• The Independent - "Osborne defends his snowfall budget..."
• The Telegraph - "UK flies 1 million snowflakes to Cyprus."

happiest man alive!!!

ok. it's all my fault...

Immigrants and those on benefits get blamed whenever there's an economic slump. They are an easy and 'visible' target to be derided. Yet the truth lies elsewhere.

Most economic slumps follow greed-based booms. This one is no exception. To put that right, you need to sort out tax-evasion and similar behaviour. It seems odd to me - though I'm no economist - that at a time when there are are more billion and millionaires, the country is apparently struggling. Clearly, most of these rich people must be 'stealing' from, rather than 'stimulating' the economy.

As an immigrant who has been here for more than 3 decades, I'm used to my demographic being blamed for most things. No worries though. In a few years, when I can get my pension, I may just go back to where I came from. I don't think I want to be the cause of economic distress, lack of jobs, extremism or rising crime. With unbelievable advances in technology, I can just as easily be a nuisance to family and friends via skype on a huge, web-ready tv.

When Dr Lorna Rixon recently shared on her Facebook wall a letter blaming immigrants, refugees and asylum-seekers for lack of decent state pensions,  (Daily Mail's version) comments made on Facebook shares - you'll have to login to your FB account to see them - speak for themselves. I naturally put forward another view. In it I explained that immigration is often a result of host countries colonising others in the past and playing empire games, leaving them politically divided and economically bereft.

It's puzzling why those who are highly educated  - and work on projects in areas with a high immigrant population - would subscribe to such a view. Perplexing when attempts at discovering that are met with:"...... I am requesting that you never contact me again. If you do I will be forced to consider other options which I do not intend to spell out here."

More worrying was a comment from Thames Valley Police officer Adam Ellis - who calls himself 'David Smith' on  Facebook - which suggested that "all immigrants and spongers should leave and shut the door behind them." I'm guessing the Thames valley area has immigrants, unemployed and people receiving benefits. Looks like they've just got themselves another challenge.... but hopefully, not one like this...


Related:
Thames Valley Police: Policing to stereotype?  metro.co.uk

What Kinds of Immigrants Come or Stay? Illegality and UK Tabloid Portrayal of Immigrants
Will Allen, Research Officer, Migration Observatory, University of Oxford

Immigration is a messy human story  Kiri Kankhwende   theguardian.com

Minister dismisses fears of new year tide of Romanians and Bulgarians migrants - independent.co.uk

We may not like Britain, but you will love Romania  gandul.info campaign.  huffingtonpost.co.uk

Iranian disabled immigrant, victim of British police deliberate failure IRIB World Sevice

Police Officers deny racially aggravated assault autistic Asian man  BBC News

Police accused of ‘institutional racism’ towards Romanies  independent.co.uk

Immigration: Could we – should we – stop migrants coming to Britain? theguardian.com